hols are dead. D:
i have lost the motivation to blog ): i dont know what to say anymore.
instead of sharing how i feel, i shall just post endless lyrics and keep changing my blogskin :D
i dunno, time to wake up and face the music?
physics retest is tomorrow.
and im scared. because its like, how well you understand how things rise and fall and move faster/slower and why the thing boil/doesnt evaporate/doesnt move not how much you study or whether you can memorise all the SI units (did i mention the SI unit of light intensity is cd? 411 class tee must be like 10000 cd.) or whether you can list out all the common applications of conduction,convection and radiation.
even if you can freaking reproduce the textbook word for word, it doesnt help.
so its basically a do or die thing.
therefore, i conclude, im pretty dead.

and prelim.
i hope to get single digit (!) for my L1R5.
which means my english/chinese cannot be getting B4. and my comb. humans. must be like B3.
which means my elec. hist cannot be a C6. and i really dont see how im supposed to be doing better than midyear when prelims is harder.

and my parents are planning the year-end trip (hopefully to california, but chances are slim.)
it seems so soon!but there's just that irritating little thing called olvls inbetween now and then.

and its been a year.
am i over it? maybe.probably.
i hope you're happy.
i hope you'll find the one you want.

quiz from cheryl's blog.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
betrayed? i really dont know, i cant remember what having a lover feels like :x
i will be crushed, i suppose.
2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
to become a (?) and help save the world! hahah.
3. What will your dream wedding be like?
eh, just a simple one? like at church, with a reception, with my close friends and relatives?
i mean its like, its the person you're gna spend the rest of your life with, you dont need anything more to make the occasion better? and besides, save money to go on an expensive honeymoon :D
4. Are you confused as to what lies ahead of you?
no, i know what i want. i just dont know how im gna get there.
5. What's your ideal lover like?
i have very high expectations! not enough space to list all ):
preferably cute. preferably musically-inclined. smart!
able to have long, thought-provoking conversations with me.(enough to entertain me for a lifetime?) generous. spontaneous.
okok i shall stop, not good enough for someone like that anyway! :x
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
loving. even if the person doesnt love you back, at least you have something to hold onto.
whats the use of having the whole world love you, but having no one to love in return?
7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
well, i depends? if there's no hope , im not gna wait.
8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
move on?
9. Is being tagged fun?
i suppose. i hardly reply tho :3
10. How do you see yourself in ten years time?
married! (hahah, hopefully. im like the eldest kid in my generation! the only hope for my grandmamas to see their grandbabies anytime soon.)
11. Who are currently the most important people to you?
Family and friends.
12. What kind of person do you think the one who tagged you is?
cherylleong. bestbestbestie! we will laugh at anything, especially each other and share the same tastes in many things (esp. food! nonono chicken rice.) and she's my love.
13. Would you rather be single & rich or married but poor?
i'd rather be..happy? married but poor i suppose. provided the spouse is THE ONE.
14. What's the first thing you do every morning?
get yelled at by my mom, wake up, look around, and fall asleep again. :x
15. Would you give it all in a relationship?
duh. whats the point of holding back?
16. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
depends on who? and its like im 'in love' with both. meaning i cant really choose right?

i cancelled off the last 2 qns 'cos they were pretty dumb.
and now, before we go, some lyrics!

better off alone - marie digby

i was naive
not to let you go
when the time was right
i was a fool
living in a dream
that i thought would last

but i know
you will try to prove me wrong
but its what i've gotta do

i think you're mistaken
im sorry to say
im really just a loser
standing in your way
i think you've forgotten
all of your plans
you see, i never meant to be here
i think you should know
you're better off alone.

and its clear, to me
that everything has changed
'cause nothing that we do
feels the same anymore
and i'll admit
i'll take the blame
maybe we just moved too fast
how could we expect
something like this to last?

you and i
we were standing and watching us fall apart
so let me go
and move along.

{ i wonder, how am i supposed to feel,
when you're not here?
'cause i've burned
every bridge i've ever built
when you were here
i still try
holding onto silly things
oh why?
all the possibilities,
im sure you've heard.

pain, make your way to me,
to me.
'cause i'll always be just so inviting
if i ever start to think straight
this heart will start a riot in me

i cant trust myself with anything but this. }